As a mental health professional and parent, I often reflect on the intricate and unpredictable journey that is parenting. Regardless of our backgrounds, we all face one undeniable truth: parenting is full of unknowns, surprises, and a blend of immense joy and deep sorrow. Each child is a unique individual, and no amount of preparation can make parenting a perfect science. We might read all the books and take all the classes, but nothing can truly prepare us for the reality of raising a child.
Embracing the imperfections of parenting is what allows us to grow alongside our children.
Parenting is an experience like no other. From the moment we bring a child into our worlds, our hearts and souls walk around outside of our control. We experience the heartache of shifting expectations, evolving dreams, and, sometimes, the loss of a part of ourselves. This journey isn’t just about guiding our children; it’s also about redefining our own identities. It’s a bittersweet journey, and acknowledging both the beauty and the struggles is essential. By embracing this duality, we find the strength to move forward with compassion and resilience.
In today’s fast-paced world, the pressure on parents is immense. The expectation to be everywhere and do everything all the time can be overwhelming. We are often led to believe that parenting is akin to a career in entertainment, where constant engagement is required. This unrealistic standard can leave us feeling inadequate and perpetually exhausted. It’s no wonder that the market for self-care and wellness is booming. Our society is slowly recognizing the critical need for parents to recharge and maintain their own well-being. But amidst the chaos and demands of parenting, one truth remains essential: You matter.
Yes, you read that right. You, as a parent, matter. It’s crucial to prioritize yourself, take breaks, sleep, exercise, and complete life tasks away from your children. These moments of self-care are not indulgences but necessities for your mental and physical health. There’s a reason why, on airplanes, they tell you to put your oxygen mask on first. If you don’t take care of yourself, you won’t be able to take care of your children. By valuing your own needs, you model healthy behaviors for your children, teaching them the importance of self-respect and balance.
Your children will be demanding.
You will be exhausted, hungry, and worn out. You will doubt every step you take. This is a part of the parenting journey that we all share. But remember, you are not alone. Every parent experiences these challenges and seeking support is a sign of strength, not weakness. You are doing your best with what you know and you are surviving. Trust in your capabilities and know that each day brings new opportunities for growth and connection. More importantly, you deserve to thrive and be confident.
That’s why I created the "Summer of Connection" program, which I offer for free every summer. It’s my way of reminding you that you are not alone on this journey. It’s an opportunity to connect, recharge, and reaffirm that your well-being is as important as your child’s well-being. Together, we can create a supportive network that empowers us to be the best versions of ourselves for our children.
So, as you navigate the beautiful, messy, and unpredictable journey of parenting, remember this: You matter. Take care of yourself first, because a thriving parent is the best gift you can give to your child. Embrace the joy and the challenges, knowing that you are enough just as you are. Your well-being is the foundation upon which your family’s happiness is built.
Amy’s Book Recommendations:
The Whole Brain Child
Have you ever stared at your child (or another person) and wondered what on earth is going on behind those eyeballs? Or have you ever had a completely lovely day with your children, turn around and they’re crying, screaming, or throwing every object within arms reach? What happened? Our brains are an amazing space that can process complicated emotions and math problems and learn multiple languages, so why is a meltdown completely unfathomable? In this book, Dan Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson pull back the curtain on what makes our kids, and ourselves tick. With practical advice and accessible neuroscience, the authors break down childhood growth and development.
Cinder: Book One of the Lunar Chronicles (12+)
So Cinderella is a cyborg and an entire intergalactic struggle hinges on her. Do I need to say more? This part cyberpunk/part fairytale reimagining is creative, inventive and was one of the first that adapted steampunk to space. A strong female heroine, a forbidden romance, classism, and an impending war makes this book fast-paced and an engaging series to start as summer winds down. Content warning: Mild cursing and some sexual references may make it inappropriate for younger readers depending on family norms.
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